I’m getting better. Deep, healing breaths of fresh air fill my chest. The smell of the grass, the sound of the horses, and the knowledge that I’m discarding the broken pieces of my past, shard by shard. Maybe I’m not leaving it behind. Maybe I’m being pieced back together, and God is destroying the ugly in the fire of forgiveness. I’m not sure. Today, during my session, Katy and I re-visited my earliest memory. I’ve done this before, but today was different—maybe because of the dream. My father and mother—a happy time. The imagery so vivid I felt like I’d been transported. Everything jumped from the recesses of my mind and invaded each sense. The cotton sundress with the tiny daisies blowing in the hot, summer wind. The spaghetti straps repeatedly falling off my spindly arms, and me fidgeting with the knots rubbing my shoulders. Mama, dressed in a long skirt tied in a knot at the knee and a red tank-top holding my hand tightly. The floppy straw hat, shielding her eyes from the sun, threatening to blow away while she stood watching him prep the little two-seater airplane. Daddy, with his wavy shoulder-length blonde hair, walking toward us. So young and vigorous. Full of life. He bends down and scoops me into his strong arms. The scent of Old Spice and soap fills the air. Gently, he places me on my two feet again. Then, he kisses my mother—passionately, as if they belong in one another’s arms for eternity. He tweaks my nose and holds his hand palm-up like a cup. I dump an imaginary handful of kisses into his as he whispers, “Save all your memories for me, sprite.” The screams that came later that afternoon still ring in my ears at times. Looking back, I think my little girl mind took my father’s last words quite literally. Walls of silence were built, and over time, not even the most evil of men could penetrate them. But, yet, the best of men might have a chance . . .
Free and Clear: The Forest Chronicles Book 3
Amanda Williams is a forty-year old wife and mother of two who can still swing her pony tail and display just a tad of sass. She is also a Jesus loving girl who realizes she is nothing without the One who saved her. Amanda has two degrees specializing in serving students with special needs and is currently working in the field of Leadership Development. She is a Christian author, speaker, blogger, and publisher who loves serving beside her husband at her local place of worship, First Baptist Church of Ocala.